I don’t know who will read this but I just need to be heard

I was officially diagnosed in April. (Thank you, shit genetics) I take metformin 500mg twice per day, I’ve gotten my a1c down to 5.8 with a strict diet and constant exercise. This might all sound like good things but I’m miserable. I’m 99 pounds (I’ve lost 15 pounds since my diagnosis) and I’m SICK AND TIRED of all of these limitations. Worrying about what I eat. I have a completely negative relationship with food, I’m borderline afraid of it. I should also mention that I have had COUNTLESS infections. Yeast, bacterial, yeast, bacterial, REPEAT — regardless of how controlled my diabetes is. Anyone I know who doesn’t have diabetes is so quick to say, “it could be cancer, at least it’s just diabetes”... do they think that makes it suck any less? IT DOESN’T. At times, I can hardly bare the thought of this being forever. I miss bagels, I miss pasta, I miss bread. I miss kit-kats. I miss enjoying what I eat. I MISS HOW THINGS USED TO BE.