I feel like the only way to treat this disease is to give up all of my weightlifting goals and starve myself.

I like to go to the gym and lift weights. It makes me feel good about myself. I'm in pretty good shape and I like that. However, this is just killing me. I'm trying to slowly gain weight so I can become stronger, but I have issues almost every single time I eat.

I feel like in order to actually maintain good numbers I'll have to eat like a bird and essentially starve myself. It's really upsetting that other people can just eat 1000's of calories in a single sitting and not have to give it a second thought.

I need to eat almost 3000 calories a day to gain weight, but my numbers just frustrate me to no end. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to give up but I also don't want to lose my kidneys, feet, eyes, and every other organ and die before I'm 50.

I just feel like no matter what combination of carbs/fats/proteins I eat it's going to spike anyway.

Maybe this was a rant I really don't know if anyone can give me advice for this but thanks for listening.